


we were younger

by iseekdaylight



Category: EXO (Band), SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Friends to Lovers, M/M, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-15
Updated: 2019-04-15
Packaged: 2019-12-31 22:30:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,513
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18323246
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/iseekdaylight/pseuds/iseekdaylight
Summary: It’s his final year in high school, and like many high school kids, he has an idea of how he wants the rest of the year to pan out.The accident involving Yoon Jeonghan isn’t part of these plans.





	we were younger

**Author's Note:**

> **Prompt #:** 9
> 
>  **Prompt:** Inspired by the movie "Our Times," two unlikely people befriend each other to help each other get their crushes to notice them. Eventually, though, they develop feelings for each other. 
> 
> **Note:** Somehow, this fic ended up going off tangent from the entire movie. Still, I hope you’ll like it! Please listen to [this](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GTauGcv4jH0) while reading the entire thing.

**2021**

It’s been ten long years since he had set foot in the campus.

Sehun smooths his hair as he walks through the grounds, feeling like a stranger on familiar territory. The gates look freshly painted, and so do the buildings. Some buildings look unfamiliar, probably renovated. The campus field where they hold assemblies is larger, with a sign showing the name of the field attached to the name of a senior he recognizes. Probably a donor.

It’s early evening, but the campus is still full of students. Some leave the grounds in groups, clutching tightly to their textbooks as they chat about what to eat for dinner or how they’re going to go through next day’s homework. Sehun wonders what it would be like to be their age again, worrying about college entrance exams instead of taxes. He’s not exactly sure if he’d like to go back to studying, but maybe to when things were simpler.

There are signage directing him to the gym, and he’s glad that he still remembers the familiar path. When he arrives, he glimpses several people already lined up outside. He spots familiar faces, people who he interacted with when he was in high school, some of them classmates, others just acquaintances.

Sehun can’t help but remember what they had been like ten years ago. They were in their uniforms, filing to class, going to the gym for PE, then dragging themselves to supplemental classes with the hopes that they’ll get to the university of their choice.

Now, they’re all in their late twenties. Some of them might be experts in their field now, while others are still figuring out their careers. Either way, Sehun is glad to see everyone in his high school again.

“Oh Sehun, is that you?”

Sehun spins around and beams at the sight of the man approaching him. “Jongin!” he exclaims, going into a light jog to meet the other one halfway and hug him. He and Jongin have kept in touch over the years, but nothing beats seeing his childhood best friend again.

They pull away, and Sehun takes his time to get a better look at Jongin. He’s wearing a suit, and his hair is slicked back, but there’s a trace of the Kim Jongin that he has come to know since they were teenagers. It puts him at ease.

“What’s wrong with you?” Jongin asks despite the grin on his face. He slightly shoves Sehun on the arm, in the usual jest that Sehun hasn’t felt in a long time. “I was asking everyone in our group if we should meet ahead of time, and you didn’t show up!”

Sehun shrugs, though he doesn’t feel sorry. “I was trying to give an element of surprise.”

Jongin snorts. “Element of surprise, my ass. You just want to be the star of the night. Is this what being abroad does to you? Where was the Oh Sehun I used to know in high school?”

“Stop being so dramatic.” Sehun laughs, and Jongin laughs with him.

It’s been ten years since they last saw each other, yet nothing has changed between them.

Jongin then looks to his sides. “Hey, where’s your other half?” he asks.

Sehun chuckles, and he can’t resist beaming. “On his way,” he says. “You know him. Caught up with his friends.”

“Let’s head inside and wait for them, then.”

The gym hasn’t changed one bit, and Sehun remembers those grueling hours of PE, running laps or doing drills or cheering on his classmates playing a basketball or volleyball game. This time, a large banner is hanging above the stage, and there’s a band onstage playing an upbeat song.

They register at the front table and receive their seat plan. It takes them a while to get to their seats because people keep approaching them and greeting them, and they end up engaging in small talk.

Everyone he knows are happy with what they’re doing. Some are professionals, others are owners of businesses, and some chose to settle down into the married life. And Sehun is glad for that.

“Took you long enough.”

By the time they arrive, their reserved table is already occupied by two men, both in dress suits. They’re both holding hands, whispering to each other as if they’re sharing secrets. Of course, Sehun knows them long enough to figure out that the two share something special.

“Seungcheol! Jisoo!”

The two men look up, and their faces split into grins. “You two!” Seungcheol exclaims, the first to stand up to give them a hug. He pulls away and pats Sehun on the cheek. “And you, Oh Sehun, it’s been five long years since I last saw you.”

“Doesn’t feel like it,” Sehun replies. “Mom’s been bothering me to bring you guys again.”

“If Jisoo and I fly back to California, we’ll see.” Seungcheol reaches for Jisoo’s hand, tangling their fingers together. “By the way, he just talked to some of our old teachers. He should be around here somewhere.”

It doesn’t take Sehun long to find _him_. His gaze immediately goes to a man with blonde hair and pale skin chatting with who he recognizes as their previous math teacher. The blonde-haired man throws his head in laughter, and even though Sehun couldn’t hear it, he knows it’s music to his ears.

Soon, their teacher excuses himself, and the blonde man turns around. Their gazes meet, and the other one’s face gradually brightens as he beams. Sehun’s breath is caught in his throat as his heart pounds quickly, which is strange because they’ve been together for a long time, and Yoon Jeonghan’s effect on him is always the same.

He could still vividly remember how it all started for them.

 

**2011**

It’s his final year in high school, and like many high school kids, he has an idea of how he wants the rest of the year to pan out: he passes his classes, he passes the CSAT, he figures out which university he wants to go to and what he wants to major in, and he and Jongin and his classmates will celebrate by eating to their heart’s content or by going to an out-of-town trip before graduation.

The accident involving Yoon Jeonghan isn’t part of these plans.

To be fair, it was his fault in the first place. He was rushing to meet Jongin for a game of soccer in the fields, thirty minutes before afternoon classes begin. Jongin had been excited to finally beat Sehun this time around, though Sehun highly doubts it.

He had turned a corner heading downstairs when he collides with someone. The shock of the collision stuns him that he’s unable to catch the other person, who rolls down the stairs and falls with a thud.

“Shit!” he says a little too loudly, rushing over to the boy with a mop of blonde hair. (He didn’t even know blonde hair is allowed.) “Hey, are you okay?”

He receives a groan as a reply as the other boy turns over. There’s an arm over his face, though Sehun could tell his face is twisted with pain.

Sehun really shouldn’t be staring, not when he thinks he’d broken the boy’s bones. “I’ll get help. Wait here,” he says, hurriedly rushing down the stairs to the direction of the clinic, which is thankfully not far from where he is.

“Don’t leave me alone here, you idiot!” he hears the boy yelling in the distance.

In hindsight, Sehun should have carried the boy himself to the clinic. But in his panic-induced state, he doesn’t trust himself to carry him safely.

Fortunately, he runs into Jongin, who helps him bring the boy to the clinic. The nurse, already resigned to not receiving patients at this time of the day, glares at Sehun before instructing him and Jongin to stay at the waiting area while she attends to the patient. Sehun tries to sit still, listening to the music from the nurse’s radio. It’s that new song by TVXQ … _Before You Go_? He really likes that song—

“Of all the people you had to accidentally bump into, it had to be Yoon Jeonghan, huh?” Jongin remarks absentmindedly, his focus on the game on his phone.

 _Yoon Jeonghan?_ “The guy who hangs out with Choi Seungcheol?” he asks. He hadn’t encountered the duo before, but he had heard about them. Seungcheol is notorious for being in fights with gangs from other schools. Yoon Jeonghan, on the other hand, is his foil. An average student, he skips classes and manages to pass them. He stirs trouble with Seungcheol, but it’s usually the harmless ones, like playing pranks on the teacher and other students.

The nurse finally approaches them after what felt like an hour. “He’s fine,” she announces. “He’s going to be limping for a few days, but nothing serious.”

Sehun sighs in relief.

“He wants to see you, though.” The nurse shakes her head in amusement before returning to her desk.

He gulps and stands up, ignoring Jongin’s throat-slashing gesture as he heads inside to where the cots are.

Jeonghan is sitting up on the bed closest to the windows, looking out at the view. He looks like a painting from a museum, ethereal with the sunlight giving him some sort of halo. He opens his mouth to speak up, announce his presence, but his throat is suddenly dry.

“Are you just gonna stand there all day or what?”

Sehun startles when Jeonghan turns to look at him, lips turned down to a frown. “S-Sorry!” he stutters, bending to a bow. “I really am sorry! I was in a hurry and I didn’t notice you were coming.”

Jeonghan sighs. “What’s your name?” he asks.

“Oh Sehun.” He feels his face grow warm at Jeonghan’s intense gaze.

“Oh Sehun,” the other boy repeats, the words practically flowing like honey on his tongue. “You’re kinda lucky I didn’t break a bone. But this”—he pats his bandaged leg—“still hurts like hell.”

“I really am sorry,” Sehun says. “I’ll make it up to you, if you want.”

Maybe he shouldn’t have said those words. They were an invitation for worse things to come. And it doesn’t really help that one side of Jeonghan’s lips have turned up to a smirk.

“Make it up to me, huh?”

Oh no. He’s doomed.

 

 

 

 

“Look, it could have been worse.”

Sehun sighs, flipping through the cram school’s dinner menu tucked inside his textbook. Mr. Jung’s droning on about math equations has become monotonous, the formulas barely registering in his brain. “He complained to me about staying behind for supplemental classes when he should be at home sleeping,” he whispers, looking at front just in case their teacher notices them chatting. “And now I feel worse.”

“You’re doing him a favor. Now he’s forced to put in effort like the rest of us who are trying to get into a good university.”

“Or maybe he’ll just sleep during supplemental,” Sehun snorts, a little too loudly that he shrinks in his seat when Mr. Jung glares at him. When the teacher looks away, he hands Jongin the menu. “Save me the kimchi jjigae combo when I get back.”

“Not if I don’t finish it by the time you get back.” Jongin smirks, taking the menu and taking his sweet time to figure out what to order before stuffing the piece of paper in his textbook.

The light rains from an hour ago turn into light snow and fog by the time class is dismissed. Sehun wraps his coat closer to his body as he parts ways with Jongin to head to Jeonghan’s classroom. The students in the room have already begun filing out, most of them grumbling and raring to eat dinner because more hours of studying take over.

Jeonghan is still sitting on his desk by the time Sehun arrives. He has his headphones on, and his eyes are closed as he listens to whatever music is playing on his phone. There’s a soft smile on his face, and Sehun has to resist from staring as he approaches.

“Jeonghan.”

The younger one looks up and smiles, tugging out his headphones and unlocking his phone to stop the music player. “You’re on time.”

“I have to get to cram school on time,” Sehun says with a shrug.

“Good luck with that.” Jeonghan grabs his bag and pushes his hand down on his desk, wincing as he gets up. “You’re gonna have to carry me to get down the stairs quickly.”

And Sehun does just that, five minutes into dragging Jeonghan out of the classroom. He’s already way behind schedule by the time he helps Jeonghan on his bike. He would have to speed up to get Jeonghan home and get to his cram school on time, but he can’t risk it, not with the roads being slippery from the snow and the rain.

“You can always skip cram school,” Jeonghan suggests, hands tight on Sehun’s sides as the latter starts to pedal.

Sehun knows he can’t. Well, his parents _have_ been bothering him to take a day or two off. (Because they’re cool like that and they didn’t really mind if their son doesn’t conform to society’s standards.) But that’s what his friends—close and otherwise—have been doing, and Sehun doesn’t exactly know what to do without the company of his friends.

That, and he knows getting into a good university is a way to figure out what he wants to do in life.

So he shakes his head. “I’ll manage.” He’s going to earn the icy glare of his cram school teacher, but he’d rather that than skip class and have a hard time catching up later on.

Fortunately, Jeonghan’s house isn’t that far away from his cram school that he manages to arrive in the classroom and scarf down the meal Jongin has saved for him five minutes before the teacher arrives.

And though he manages to make it to class on time after spending the past half hour worrying about being late, he couldn’t seem to concentrate. His thoughts are on Yoon Jeonghan and his rather angelic smile, no matter how much he tries to shake them off.

 

 

 

 

The moment he became Yoon Jeonghan’s ‘errand boy’, he thought it would be days full of nonstop torture, of Jeonghan asking him to do impossible tasks or even playing scapegoat in whatever prank he and Seungcheol would pull.

As expected, the days are full of errands. As promised, Sehun would pick up Jeonghan from his home and take him to school, and he would meet Jeonghan in the latter’s classroom to bring him home before rushing for cram school. And during the day, it was mostly him buying Jeonghan’s lunch in the cafeteria or returning some way overdue books at the library.

Sometimes, he would be asked to buy the most innocuous things, like a couple of pins. Sehun wouldn’t know that it was part of a prank until he would hear Seungcheol and Jeonghan were sent to the principal’s office.

Despite that, Jeonghan has proved to be quite harmless. He mostly sleeps during class, sometimes sleeps through lunch break, and reads random books inside textbooks when he’s awake. Jeonghan is surprisingly well-versed with a lot of things, from knowing how to pick a lock or finding a way to make something explode without making a sound.

“I learn what I want to learn,” Jeonghan says when Sehun asked about it, the rare times Sehun would initiate a conversation with him. “And that’s what makes you and me different. I’m not gonna force myself to learn something if I don’t like it.”

Sehun knows that’s hardly how the world works. They’re supposed to hit the books and listen to teachers drone on about what they need to learn to get into a good university. Then when they get to university, they have to learn from their professors how to do well for their future careers.

Jeonghan doesn’t seem to care about that, and Sehun thinks he should be concerned. But really, it’s none of his business. He’s just supposed to do what Jeonghan tells him to do, and they probably won’t talk to each other anymore after this.

Of course, it doesn’t work out the way Sehun wants it to. Jeonghan would drag him to the school rooftop during lunch break, which caused quite a scene in his classroom that has their class president, Hong Jisoo, judging him by the time he returns.

The company isn’t so bad, though. Seungcheol, for all his mischief, is friendly and likes comic books. He and Sehun spend hours poring over Marvel Cinematic Universe theories while sharing side dishes, while Jeonghan either naps or provides useless commentary.

Jongin gets a bit clingy when Sehun had hung out with Seungcheol and Jeonghan every day for the past week, so he invites his friend to have lunch with them at the rooftop.

And it was a hit, since Jongin and Seungcheol instantly bonded. Which he didn’t expect. But at least he can relax on the fact that he’s starting to feel less like an errand boy and more of … something else.

He can’t quite put a finger on what it is yet, but it sure feels nice.

 

 

 

 

Jeonghan stops limping at the beginning of April, thus relieving Sehun of his errand boy duties. But for some reason, he couldn’t seem to cut back the habit, as he continues to pick up Jeonghan from his home so they could go to school together.

April meant negative-degree temperatures and fogs in the morning, making it difficult to get to school by bike, so they usually end up walking. They aren’t in that level of friendship (sort of) yet to engage in conversations during the walk, but Sehun doesn’t mind the silence.

“Are you sure you really wanna walk with me to school?” Jeonghan asks him one time. “You’re not my errand boy anymore, you know.”

Sehun hums. He can’t explain it himself, but he doesn’t want this to stop. At least, not yet. So he settles with a “So you don’t want me sticking around anymore?”

“I didn’t say that,” Jeonghan says, and Sehun could have sworn he saw a tinge of pink on the younger one’s cheeks.

Jeonghan, though, stops staying behind for supplemental, giving Sehun plenty of time to grab a quick bite with Jongin before cram school starts. Review sessions become more torturous and more draining. They have seven months to go before the CSAT, and there’s no room for error since their futures are on the line.

Sometimes Sehun wonders what it would be like to be like Jeonghan or Seungcheol, who don’t seem to care about what everyone else cares about. But what should he care about? He doesn’t even know himself.

His thoughts are interrupted when a hand slams against his locker. Jeonghan grins and leans against the metal, smirking as he crosses his arms. “Heard from Jongin it’s your birthday tomorrow,” he says.

Sehun blinks but nods. He’s turning eighteen, which isn’t really a big deal except it’s probably the only day he’ll skip cram school. He usually celebrates it by blowing a birthday cake over family dinner. He’d probably receive tons of greetings and some gifts from friends, but that’s it. (Well, he is looking forward to that newly launched MacBook Air his uncle from Chicago had promised him.)

“Any plans?” he asks.

“Just dinner with my family. But otherwise it’s a regular day for me.”

Jeonghan scoffs. “Still planning to go to school on your birthday? Where’s the fun in that?” He shifts closer and lowers his voice. “Wanna play hooky tomorrow?”

Sehun’s eyes widen. “Why?”

“Because it’s your special day, and I haven’t skipped class in weeks, which is an atrocity, really, because Cheol and I skip class almost every week.” Jeonghan sighs, running a hand through his hair. “Come on, just once? Let your brain relax for just one day and have fun!”

For some strange reason, Sehun is actually considering it. Because the only time he didn’t go to school was when he was sick, and that was only once. Besides, it’s only for one day, right?

Sehun sighs in resignation. “Fine,” he says, and he doesn’t miss the way Jeonghan’s face brightens up. “Um, so … how do we do it?”

“Simple. You leave for school as usual, but we meet someplace else. We change into more casual clothes, and then we hang out somewhere.”

He gulps. “But aren’t we going to get in trouble with our parents?”

He doesn’t miss the way Jeonghan flinches. “They’re used to it already,” he says. “The school doesn’t really call our parents whenever we skip class, anyway. Unless you’re, you know, a star student or something.”

Sehun isn’t. He’s pretty average, and he’s sure the school didn’t check on his parents when he was sick that one time.

“Any more questions?” Jeonghan asks, grinning. He’s practically bouncing as if he’s looking forward to Sehun skipping his classes.

And well, for some reason, Sehun is looking forward to it, too.

 

 

 

 

His palms are sweaty the next day, and he tries to act as normal as possible when he heads downstairs for breakfast. His parents greet him and serve him grilled short ribs, spicy stewed fish, and cold cucumber soup, his favorite breakfast combination.

“How about you skip cram school for today?” his father suggests. “Your mom is planning something special for dinner.”

He gulps, looking down at his bowl of rice. “Okay,” he says. The thought of telling his parents about his plans to skip class today is strong, but he decides against it. What kid would tell his parents that he’s skipping class anyway?

The skies are clear that day. Sehun would have taken his bike but decides against it since he doesn’t know where they’re going. He takes out his phone and checks Jeonghan’s message, containing instructions as to where they should meet. He then looks over his shoulder for any signs of familiar faces in school uniform before making his way to their meeting place.

Seungcheol and Jeonghan are already at the agreed-upon meeting place by the time he arrives—a GS25 store by the entrance of the city. A tall man by the counter eyes him curiously until a customer arrives with bread and banana milk. Sehun shrinks from the gaze before approaching his friends. “You guys didn’t bother wearing uniforms, huh?” he says.

Seungcheol brightens up and waves. “Didn’t think you’d show up, birthday boy,” he greets. “Guess Jeonghan can be very persuasive.”

Jeonghan rolls his eyes. “We’re used to it. Even Changmin hyung here knows we’re skipping school.” He jabs his thumb at the direction of the cashier.

“Just don’t get into trouble,” Changmin the cashier says. “Especially at this store.”

“Of course.” Jeonghan hands Sehun a paper bag with the GS25 logo. “Bought you a snack. Happy birthday.”

It’s just a pork bun, but the gesture sends warmth spreading across Sehun’s chest. “Thanks.”

To his surprise, Changmin allows him to change into more casual clothes in the convenience store’s back room. He even hands him a paper bag with some snacks and soda. “Heard it’s your birthday,” he says before waving goodbye to him, Seungcheol, and Jeonghan.

It’s strange to be in the city at this time of the weekday. There are fewer people in the streets, and there are only a few stores open. “What are we gonna do?” he asks.

“I haven’t thought that far yet,” Seungcheol replies, hands behind his head. “What do you think we should do, Jeonghan?”

Jeonghan hums. “The arcade won’t be open until 10, so …” He brightens up and snaps his fingers. “PC bang?”

“Music to my ears.” Seungcheol grins, turning the other way, presumably to the direction of the store.

Sehun has only been to a PC bang once, and that was when he and Jongin were in middle school. By the time they reached senior high, they stopped going to enroll in cram school. He doesn’t miss it, though. As much as he enjoyed playing for hours, he realized that it wasn’t something he could do again.

“What do you guys usually play?” he asks when they turn a corner then head up the stairs of a building.

“Guild Wars 2,” Jeonghan replies, shoving his hands in his pockets. “I’m not exactly good at it, but it’s fun. Seungcheol is more of an expert at it than I am. He’s pretty popular at this PC bang, too.”

Sure enough, a couple of players greet Seungcheol when they enter the PC bang. Seungcheol introduces him to Wonwoo, Jihoon, and Soonyoung, who are a year younger and are part of the same guild as he is.

They head to the last three seats of their assigned row. Seungcheol is quick to put on the available headphones and open the game interface. Jeonghan, though, opens Chrome and loads Naver.

“You aren’t playing?” Sehun asks.

Jeonghan shakes his head. “I usually just watch a movie,” he replies. “Sometimes I nap midway.”

“Oh.” Sehun glances at his computer screen, not really feeling the mood to play Guild Wars 2. “What movie do you have in mind?”

Jeonghan ends up loading a website that streams movies—which Sehun is sure is illegal—and chooses _Scott Pilgrim vs. the World_ with, fortunately, Korean subtitles. Sehun has watched that movie with Jongin and a couple of classmates over the summer, and he actually enjoyed it.

Jeonghan, though, falls asleep by the time Scott defeats the twin evil-exes. His head is turned to the side, cushioned by his arms, his chest rising rhythmically with every intake of breath. The sight feels peaceful, vulnerable even, that Sehun feels his throat dry up.

He shakes his head and pauses the movie from Jeonghan’s computer, opening Chrome in his own computer to find something to read or watch.

 

 

 

 

He’s not going to admit that skipping class is actually nice, at least every now and then. Sehun may be worried about the schoolwork he’ll need to catch up on, but he’ll save it for tomorrow. Now, this is actually the most enjoyable birthday he had in a while.

They leave the PC bang at noon and have lunch at Pomato with Seungcheol’s three guildmates. Seungcheol and Jeonghan buy two orders of boiled dumplings to celebrate Sehun’s birthday before the oldest of the group falls into the discussion with the three youngest about strategies for an upcoming Guild Wars 2 tournament.

Jeonghan, meanwhile, surprises Sehun by trying to feed him a dumpling with his chopsticks. Sehun obliges only after a couple of prods, and he looks down at his bowl of rice in an attempt to hide the redness of his cheeks.

“Let’s drop by somewhere,” Jeonghan suggests, standing up even though Seungcheol, Wonwoo, Jihoon, and Soonyoung are still immersed in conversation. Seungcheol, though, doesn’t pay attention as if he’s used to Jeonghan leaving him.

“Where are we going?” he asks, though he doesn’t get his answer even as Jeonghan grabs him by the wrist and drags him out of Pomato.

“Somewhere” actually meant a store where CDs take up one half of the room while books take up the other half. He doesn’t miss the way Jeonghan’s eyes brighten as they step in, a woman with the name tag “Yoojin” cheerily greeting him as they enter.

“We have some new books in stock,” Yoojin addresses Jeonghan, gesturing somewhere in the books section.

Jeonghan smiles and nods. “I’ll have a look at the CDs first,” he says, still not letting go of Sehun’s hand as he drags him to the Music section. He grins at the huge display of TVXQ’s latest release on the biggest track. “See, Yoojin noona has taste. _Before You Go_ was released last month, but it’s still displayed prominently in this store.”

There’s a music player on the CD racks, and Jeonghan makes his way to the first one, popping the latest 4Minute CD and putting on the earphones. Sehun ends up runs a hand through the CD cases as he walks through the racks, not really knowing what to do. A couple of titles caught his eye, and he makes a mental note to buy them when he gets his allowance.

“Sehun, come here and listen to this.”

Sehun looks over his shoulder. Jeonghan has lifted one bud of the earphones and is looking at him pointedly. Finding nothing else to do, he approaches Sehun and takes the free earphone bud.

Instead of 4Minute’s upbeat song, jazzy music wafts through the earphones. Sehun blinks, glancing at Jeonghan questioningly. “What song is this?” he asks.

“Norah Jones?” Jeonghan flips through the CD case where a Caucasian woman with curly hair is looking to the side. “I just grabbed a random CD.”

“You always do that?”

“Yeah. It’s always fun to discover something new.” Jeonghan smirks. “Not something you would find out in a classroom every day.”

Sehun rolls his eyes but says nothing more.

“Any special requests?” Jeonghan asks when the jazz song is finished playing. “Any songs that you like to listen to, Oh Sehun?”

They end up listening to a couple of songs from a hip-hop album until Jeonghan gets bored decides to venture into the Books section. Sehun watches as the younger one’s slender fingers run through the titles before grabbing a random book. Curiosity getting the better of him, he walks towards Jeonghan and takes a peek at the book.

“Sometimes Wonwoo’s the one I go with to the bookstore,” Jeonghan admits, flipping through the pages of what looks like a travel book. “He likes books more than I do.”

“Wonwoo, huh.” It makes sense. The bespectacled, brooding boy who happens to be Seungcheol’s guildmate looks like he likes reading. “What do you guys usually read?”

“He likes crime and mystery. Higashino Keigo, mostly. I just pick a book with an interesting title and plot then go from there. You?”

Sehun admits that he’s not much into reading outside class. “I read Marvel comics and a bit of manga,” he adds.

Jeonghan hums, stopping at a page with a huge photo of a mountain. “Jihoon likes Marvel comics, too,” he says absentmindedly. “Do we have nothing in common?”

He blinks. He wasn’t even aware that Jeonghan is looking for something in common with him. “I-I don’t know?” he says. They haven’t really talked a lot, even when he’s starting to become less of an errand boy. “Do we have to have something in common?”

Jeonghan laughs as he closes the book. “No, I suppose not.”

Sehun raises an eyebrow, though he couldn’t stop one side of his lips from turning up.

Their conversation is interrupted when Jeonghan’s phone beeps. The younger one returns the book on the shelf and unlocks his phone. There’s no missing the way Jeonghan’s eyes widen as he swears, catching the attention of Yoojin.

“What’s wrong?” Sehun asks.

“Cheol needs backup from some kids at the other school.” Jeonghan sighs, stuffing his phone in his pocket. “You go ahead. I need to help him.”

“Do you want me to call the cops?” Yoojin offers.

Jeonghan smiles gratefully. “They’re at the nearby riverbanks. Thank you, noona.”

Sehun decides to go with Jeonghan, despite the younger one’s insistence for him to stay behind. He hasn’t known the duo for too long, but he already feels some sort of kinship with them. He’s worried Seungcheol might get injured, even though he looks like he could handle the fight on his own.

Sure enough, Seungcheol is by the nearby riverbank, being cornered by a bunch of students that look taller and broader. Yet, the older one is grinning, as if his current situation doesn’t bother him. If Sehun were in his shoes, he would have jumped into the waters and swam to wherever.

Seungcheol finally notices them and waves. “You guys came!” he yells cheerfully. “Dongho here is forcing me to remember some debt I apparently owe him.”

Jeonghan throws his head back in laughter as he approaches. (While Sehun tries not to look at anyone in the eye.) “Didn’t he try to do that last time and he got his ass served in a silver platter?”

“Your boyfriend is definitely asking for a beating, Choi Seungcheol,” the gangster named Dongho says ominously, hands curled into fists.

“So are you, Kang Dongho.” Seungcheol finally strides forward and shoves the gangster aside.

That’s when hell breaks loose. Seungcheol avoids a punch thrown at him and Jeonghan pushes Sehun aside as they evade a kick.

It all feels like this gangster high school drama that Sehun wants no part of.

Someone decides to charge toward him, only to be punched by Jeonghan. “You better make a run for it,” the younger one says. “Wouldn’t want to see the birthday boy—”

“Look out!” Sehun shoves a gangster that was about to charge toward Jeonghan. The gangster topples over another gangster, and the two groan in pain.

Jeonghan glances at the two before grinning and winking at Sehun. “Not bad for your first gangster fight.”

Eventually, they hear the whistle of the cops, causing them to scramble. Sehun runs as fast as he could to keep up with Seungcheol and Jeonghan, the latter’s grip on his wrist tight.

They find themselves back at the GS25 where Changmin works, though this time a guy named Kyuhyun is manning the cashier. Kyuhyun looks like he’s used to Seungcheol and Jeonghan’s antics and barely bats an eyelash when the two grab bottles of water in the fridge and drink it before paying.

Sehun, meanwhile, sags on one of the chairs, trying to catch his breath. Part of him concludes that he would not rather be involved in a skirmish again, but another part of him feels … exhilarated? At least, in a way.

“Sorry I ruined your birthday for you,” Seungcheol says, scratching his chin as he hands Sehun a chocolate bar. “Peace offering.”

Sehun laughs as he takes the chocolate bar. “It’s okay,” he says. “It sort of made my birthday interesting.”

The two laugh along as they proceed to regale their skirmish with the gangsters.

 

 

 

 

Sehun had been so immersed with the day’s events that he didn’t really bother checking his phone until the sun has set and they were a couple of hours into jamming to songs in the karaoke.

There are a couple of texts from Jongin.

One was sent during lunch break, asking him if he was sick.

The second one caused him to freeze over.

_“i went to your house and your mom said you left for school?? i’m confused?? are you skipping classes now?”_

Another is a message from his mother.

_“Wherever you are, please head home. We need to talk.”_

His hands are shaking as he grabs his bag and stands up, just as Seungcheol is jamming to a Big Bang song. “My mom knows,” he announces. “I have to go.”

Jeonghan stops the music, a frown on his face. He and Seungcheol share a gaze before he announces, “We’ll go with you.”

Sehun blinks. “But—”

“I convinced you to skip class,” Jeonghan interrupts, his hand up. “I should take the blame.”

His pace is heavy as he trudges through his home, dreading the conversation that will possibly ensue. He has never gotten into this extent of trouble before, and the thought of disappointing his parents weighs heavily on his chest.

To his surprise, though, his mother isn’t angry when he arrives and starts mumbling his apologies. “You should have told me you wanted to take a day off, and I would have agreed,” she says. “It’s your birthday, and you’ve been studying hard, after all.”

It’s hard to believe, but he says sorry anyway.

He gets grounded over the weekend, which he sorts of expected already.

Then his mother invites Jeonghan and Seungcheol for dinner.

And the rest of the night isn’t so bad. Jongin arrives, sharing what he missed at school that day. His mother has taken a liking to Jeonghan and Seungcheol even though they blatantly admit that they like skipping classes or not paying attention to schoolwork.

“Make a wish, Sehunnie,” Jeonghan singsongs just as his mother comes out with the birthday cake.

Sehun has never been the type to make a wish on his birthday, mostly because he doesn’t know what to wish for. But today, he’s probably going to make an exception. Especially when everything unexpected started giving his usually dull life a splash of color.

So he wishes for livelier days and blows the candles on his cake.

 

 

 

 

The days definitely became livelier, especially since Jeonghan and Seungcheol entered the picture. Sehun learns lunch breaks and classes off become more enjoyable when he’s hanging out with more people. He shares manga recommendations with Seungcheol and discusses Marvel Universe theories with Jihoon. He and Jeonghan stop by the music-slash-bookstore to listen to random songs and browse through random books.

The first thing he learns from Jeonghan is that he likes TVXQ songs. “Pre-lawsuit or post-lawsuit?” he couldn’t resist asking.

He earns a glare from Jeonghan. “I love them, no matter what era they’re in. As two, as five, or as three.”

“Sorry, just asking,” Sehun says, but he can’t resist chuckling as to how affected Jeonghan was. “Have you ever watched them live?”

“I wanted to, but …”

His sigh is somehow nostalgic, as if a memory made him sad. But as much as it made Sehun curious, he doesn’t push the topic.

He certainly became a subject of whispers when Jeonghan and Seungcheol would drop by his classroom during lunch break. It was embarrassing for him at first—especially whenever Jisoo would raise his eyebrow at him then at Jeonghan, with Jeonghan, strangely enough, avoiding his gaze—but he had come to get used to it.

And then there are their families welcoming each other. His parents would often invite Jeonghan and Seungcheol—in addition to Jongin—over for dinner, especially during Fridays. And sometimes in the morning, Jeonghan’s mother would invite him over for breakfast before they would head to school.

If Jeonghan could be savage, his mother is equally so. She may look gentle at first, but she could return sharp comments easily whenever she’s talking to Jeonghan or his younger sister.

They often play this game of Twenty Questions whenever it’s just the two of them. He learns that Jeonghan is a pasta person and gets tired easily. Sehun shares his obsession with bubble tea and that he wants to be a dancer in another life.

What he doesn’t expect, though, was Jeonghan’s interest over learning. “You like science?” Sehun says incredulously. They were having lunch at the rooftop, on a sunny spring day, when Jeonghan shares this tidbit.

“Ever since I was a kid.” Jeonghan shrugs, leaning against the railing. “Mom used to bring home encyclopedias, and I would take everything in. I really like chemistry. I always felt like a scientist whenever I had to mix stuff. And I like knowing what something is made of. It’s like, by knowing you’re made up of something, you really are meant to exist.”

Sehun had never thought of it that way, since he hated science. But what Jeonghan said made sense. “No offense, but how come you never worked hard in your studies?” he asks. “You seem to love learning.”

He doesn’t miss the downcast gaze Jeonghan makes when he looks up at the clear skies. “I still do,” he answers. “Just …” He shakes his head. “Come hang out on Saturday. Cheol’s coming, and you can bring Jongin, too.”

“I’ll ask my parents,” Sehun replies, though he knows his parents would say yes anyway.

That Saturday, he and Jongin show up just as Mrs. Yoon has set up the table. Seungcheol is already sprawled on the couch, reading the latest _One Piece_ chapter, while Jeonghan is bickering with his sister over what looks like a cake.

“What’s the occasion?” Jongin asks.

“Oh, nothing, really,” Mrs. Yoon replies with a grin. “We haven’t had these much people over in a while.”

“Yeah!” Jeonghan’s sister pipes up. “The last time oppa had other friends over was—”

“Seoyeon,” Mrs. Yoon interrupts firmly, “why don’t you check if the rice is cooked?”

Lunch was amicable, with them talking about everything and nothing. Soon, Mrs. Yoon and Seoyeon leave them alone to watch some variety show on TV, and Jeonghan leads them to his room upstairs. Sehun can’t help but snort at the TVXQ poster by the headboard of the bed, and he receives a kick on the shin from Jeonghan in retaliation.

Seungcheol suggests they play video games, and Jeonghan loads _Assassin’s Creed_ on his Xbox 360. They take turns taking control of the main character, and Sehun gives up after losing five times.

He takes the opportunity to go to the bathroom, and after which he mindlessly walks around the second-floor hallways, glancing at the collection of framed photos lined up on the walls leading to the bathroom.

It’s a collection of family photos from Jeonghan’s childhood up to now. Jeonghan was adorable as a kid, smiling cheekily in photos beside his sister while their parents hover above them.

As he looks further down, though, Sehun notices the absence of Mr. Yoon as the years pass by in the photos. Jeonghan looks like his expression in the photos have gotten sourer and sourer, too.

“Oppa’s changed, hasn’t he?”

He jumps and spins around, only to find Seoyeon standing behind him, carrying a tray of snacks. “You scared me,” he points out, hand clutching his chest.

“Sorry.” She shrugs apologetically, then glancing at the collection of photos. “Mom and Dad divorced after he graduated from middle school. He then came home after the first week of high school with blonde hair.”

Sehun chuckles, imagining an indifferent Jeonghan coming home with blonde hair. “I bet he became a handful.”

“Mom had a hard time handling him, but she let him do what he wanted eventually. Said it’s a coping mechanism and all,” Seoyeon continues, sighing. “But Mom still wonders what she could have done. I mean, oppa used to be third best in class. And he used to hang out with Jisoo oppa.”

“As in Hong Jisoo?” Sehun clarifies, eyes wide. He had never expected Jeonghan to be friends with the president of his class. Then again, the way Jisoo regarded him whenever Jeonghan would drop by the classroom to visit him made sense now.

Seoyeon nods, and she slightly jumps when Jeonghan’s bedroom door opens and Seungcheol steps out.

 

 

 

 

Sehun couldn’t stop thinking about what he heard from Seoyeon, even when he and Jongin said their goodbyes and headed home that evening. Somehow, he knew that Yoon Jeonghan was smarter than he had let on. But knowing a bit of his family history, Sehun now knows that the younger one had just lost his motivation.

But he needs more answers.

That chance comes when he and Jisoo have been paired for a math homework. They’re in the library, figuring out how to solve a word problem, and Sehun’s brain was about to explode from the equation that he simply drops the bomb. “You and Jeonghan,” he begins, “you used to be best friends.”

There’s no missing the way Jisoo’s eyes widen before his shoulders eventually sag. “Did he tell you that?” he asks, his voice small.

“His sister,” Sehun replies with a shake of his head.

Jisoo’s laugh sounds hollow. “He’s not going to acknowledge that I used to be his best friend, huh?”

“What happened to you two?” he asks. “I heard he changed after his parents’ divorce, but …”

Jisoo nods. “He was devastated. His parents have always been encouraging of him to study hard, but after the divorce, he just stopped caring. Then in freshman year, he started hanging out with Seungcheol. I gave him space because that was what he probably needed, but he dyed his hair and started distancing himself, and …” He takes a deep breath and blinks rapidly. “There.”

“Sorry,” Sehun could only mumble. He isn’t at fault, but he probably brought back painful memories.

“I’ve forgiven him,” Jisoo says with a shake of his head. “And I don’t mind if he changed. I just miss my best friend.”

Sehun vaguely remembers a time when he was younger, when his childhood friend moved to the United States. The feeling of hollowness returned to him as he remembers looking through the windows of his home to find the neighboring home empty. They had exchanged letters back then, but they stopped communicating frequently after a while.

So he gets it. “Do you want me to talk to him?” he asks.

Jisoo looks at him expectantly. “Thank you.” He reaches for Sehun’s hand and squeezes it lightly.

The thing is, Sehun doesn’t know how he could talk to Jeonghan about his family and Jisoo without being too intrusive. After all, Jeonghan didn’t talk to him about it, and he certainly didn’t want to make it known that Jeonghan’s sister revealed everything to him.

He gets his chance, though, when Jeonghan drops by his home on Friday night. His mother looks excited to see Jeonghan and offers them a few snacks, then instructing them to head to Sehun’s room while she prepares dinner.

It’s Jeonghan’s first time in Sehun’s room, and he takes his time looking at the shelf full of books, hand running through the spines. He then chuckles at the sight of the stacks of review books on the desk.

“Where do you plan to go after high school?” Jeonghan asks, flopping on Sehun’s bed before the older one could even offer.

Ah, that dreaded question. “I don’t know,” he answers. “Everyone wants to go to a SKY university, but I don’t mind if I don’t. As long as I pass, I guess. I don’t even know what I want to major in.”

“And yet you study really hard,” Jeonghan observes, lying down. “Isn’t it weird? To work hard even though you don’t have a solid plan?”

“Maybe.” Sehun imitates the gesture, and he takes comfort in how warm Jeonghan’s arm is next to him. “Mom says I don’t need to rush it, that I’ll figure it out in time. But with the way everyone else is talking about their dream jobs and universities, sometimes I feel like I’m way behind.”

Jeonghan chuckles. “You’re lucky your parents aren’t so demanding.” He looks up at the ceiling, then closes his eyes.

There it is, the chance to ask Jeonghan about what he had learned the past week. “Your mom seems cool about, um, you skipping classes,” he points out.

“Not really. I think she gave up on me.” He feels Jeonghan shrug. “She and her husband divorced back when I was in middle school. I used to enjoy studying and they told me I could make it to the top universities. And I used to want that, too, but I … stopped caring.”

Sehun keeps silent, but his heart tinges. Suddenly, he appreciates his parents being together, even if they got into arguments now and then. He’s grateful that his parents are supportive of him, even if he lacks the motivation to find a goal and stick to it. “You must be a really good student back then,” he remarks, instead.

He catches the way Jeonghan smiles at the comment. “I like science,” he says. “I still do, especially chemistry. Jisoo—he’s in your class—and I used to want to be scientists. But I became angry and lost.” He sighs. “Then Cheol befriended me and asked me to skip classes with him, and I just … did. And I liked being with Cheol. For the first time, I felt like I didn’t need to live up to anyone’s expectations.”

“What about Jisoo?” Sehun asks.

“Being with Jisoo was painful,” he says. “I don’t know, he made me remember who I used to be back then.” He hears Jeonghan sniff. “I’m a jerk, aren’t I? I didn’t even tell him I want to distance myself. I just did without an explanation.”

“Have you tried talking to him?”

Jeonghan chuckles. “I want to. But when I try, I get scared. He probably hates me right now.”

Sehun knows Jisoo doesn’t, based on their conversation, but Jeonghan doesn’t need to know that from him. “You wouldn’t know until you give it a shot. Maybe Jisoo has been waiting for you.”

“Probably. He’s too nice, I don’t think I deserve it.” Jeonghan sits up, rubbing his eyes. “Hey, let’s read one of your comics.”

Sehun doesn’t push the discussion and pulls out the first chapter of _Bakuman_ , explaining the plot as he flips through the pages. Jeonghan doesn’t seem to be paying attention, though, sighing every now and then and staring off faraway. He returns to his cheerful self when Sehun’s mother calls them for dinner, but he doesn’t miss a few heavy sighs when the conversation dies down.

Jeonghan says goodbye after he helps Sehun and his mother clear the table. His mother nudges him out of the kitchen to see Jeonghan off, and for some reason, Sehun knows what to say.

“Jeonghan,” he begins, his grip tight on the door handle.

The younger one tilts his head questioningly.

He takes a deep breath, even though he knows he shouldn’t be nervous about this. “If you miss learning, I think you shouldn’t stop from that. You owe it to yourself to still do what you want to do. But you can still be who you are today.” He blushes and looks down at his feet. “Just saying.”

There’s a few seconds of silence before Jeonghan says, “I’ll keep that in mind.”

When Sehun looks up, Jeonghan is smiling at him, and his nervousness melts away. “Okay,” he says, nodding. “See you on Monday?”

“Yup. See you.” Jeonghan gives him a small wave and turns around to head back inside.

 

 

 

 

Weekends were a little busy, with Sehun visiting his relatives in town. He chats with Jeonghan, and they talk like they usually would, mostly about random stuff and random emojis for replies.

Which was why he doesn’t expect to arrive at Jeonghan’s home that day and meet the younger one, now with newly dyed black hair.

He blinks rapidly, making sure that he isn’t seeing things. Then, he says, quite dumbly, “You … dyed your hair?”

“I did, genius.” There’s a faint blush on Jeonghan’s cheeks, and he laughs as he scratches his cheek. “Come on. We’re gonna be late.”

Jeonghan doesn’t worry about being late for school. Sometimes he would even take his sweet time walking leisurely, causing Sehun to panic.

But he doesn’t point that out. Jeonghan might get self-conscious.

“I was thinking,” Jeonghan speaks up as they walk, “I’d like to get back to studying. For serious.”

Sehun tries to hide the grin forming on his face, but it fails. “Okay,” he says simply. “Are you planning to go to cram school?”

“Maybe not, I think it’s too late.” Jeonghan scrunches his nose. “First term finals are coming up, though. I don’t think I can catch up.”

“We can form a study group. Jongin would be game. You can convince Seungcheol, if he wants.”

Jeonghan chuckles at that. “His mother _did_ give him this long-ass lecture about caring about his grades. I’ll try to drag him along.”

“How about …” Sehun trails off. He wants to invite Jisoo to their study group, but that might be too soon.

The younger one seems to have read his mind, as he smiles apologetically and shake his head. “Let me handle that,” he says. “I’ll figure out how to talk to him. Eventually.”

Fair enough. “Okay.”

They schedule the study group on Saturday mornings at someone’s house. Jeonghan tends to oversleep on the first two weeks, but it all becomes smooth sailing from there. Sehun and Jongin are updated on schoolwork and are able to relay what they have learned to Jeonghan and Seungcheol.

Seungcheol would take some time understanding the materials, but Jeonghan is quick to breeze through it. He’s even better in science than Jongin and Sehun are.

“Are you sure you don’t study?” Seungcheol says in disbelief at one time, causing everyone to laugh.

Jeonghan simply shrugs.

After half a day of studying, they would usually go out, eat in some restaurant, head to the usual PC bang, or just hang out by the riverbank. Sometimes Jeonghan would stay over at his place, or him at Jeonghan’s place, and have dinner with their families.

“His grades are improving,” Jeonghan’s mother had told him one time. “I don’t know what you did, but thank you.”

Sehun feels his face flame up. He knows he had hardly done anything to cause this change. It was all Jeonghan’s doing.

Speaking of Jeonghan, he looks more … cheerful. He laughs more heartily, and Sehun could have sworn his eyes would sparkle whenever he talks about something like some chemistry topic. But he’s still the same Yoon Jeonghan – sharp tongue and all.

And really, Sehun wouldn’t ask for a different Yoon Jeonghan either way.

 

 

 

 

First-term finals are finally over, and the school festival season begins. They don’t see each other for a week as they were busy with their classmates, figuring out how their class could sell. Should they set up a cafe or a kissing booth or a haunted house? The possibilities are endless.

Their class ends up organizing a balloon fight at the campus grounds, and it was a hit. Their schoolmates flock to the grounds to grab some balloons and just throw them at each other, even if they don’t know the person who they’re throwing it to. It’s pure chaos, but it looks like the school administration doesn’t mind.

Sehun is monitoring their water balloon supply and watching the chaos in front of him when he feels a tap on his shoulder. It’s Soojung, a towel draped around her shoulders, her uniform drenched. She’s smiling as she hands him a water balloon. “Wanna play?” she offers. “I can take over your shift.”

He hears Jongin swear from the distance, and he can’t resist laughing. From the corner of his eye, he could see Jeonghan chasing Seungcheol on the campus grounds, uncharacteristically full of energy that day. He then turns back to Soojung and takes the water balloon. “Thanks!”

He narrowly dodges a water balloon thrown by a random schoolmate as he rushes toward Jongin. His friend is now hiding behind one of the makeshift hideaways they have set up, peeking now and then for any familiar faces. “Who’s our target?” he asks.

Jongin peeks from their hideaway and ducks just as a water balloon hits the edge. “Your boyfriend, duh!”

Sehun is about to point out that he doesn’t have a boyfriend, when he feels a soft bump on his head, followed by a cold sensation that extends throughout his body. His rubs his face with his sleeve and opens his eyes to identify the suspect –

He’s face to face with Jeonghan, a smug grin on his face as he bounces a water balloon on his hand. “Hello, Sehun,” he drawls. “Remember when you almost broke my ankle?”

“I thought I already made it up to you,” Sehun scoffs. Still, he knows Jeonghan says it in jest, which is why he not-so subtly picks up one of Jongin’s water balloons to prepare himself for what’s to come.

What he doesn’t expect, though, was for Jeonghan to lurch forward just as someone throws a water balloon on his back.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry!”

Jeonghan turns around and practically freezes.

The suspect is none other than Jisoo. His eyes are wide, and his hands are covering his mouth. He’s pale, possibly not expecting that the person he had just hit is his estranged best friend.

Awkward silence falls among the four of them. Sehun contemplates on whether he should break the ice, throw a water balloon or start a conversation. Anything to diffuse the tension.

But it’s Jeonghan who throws the water balloon at Jisoo. Jisoo yelps as he gets splashed with water, and it takes a while for him to shake some water out of his face.

And when Jisoo has opened his eyes, Jeonghan is smiling. He looks nervous, but Sehun could tell that he’s finally making the first step to patch things up between him and Jisoo.

Then Jisoo practically beams, procuring another water balloon from his pocket and hurling it at Jeonghan.

Jeonghan shrieks but doesn’t make an effort to dodge the balloon, drenching him as a result. “I deserved that,” he says, “but you’re still gonna pay!”

This results in a four-way goose chase all over the campus grounds as they try to hit each other with as many water balloons as they could. Soon, Seungcheol joins in, and it became a three-to-one match with Sehun, Jongin, and Jisoo on one side and Seungcheol and Jeonghan on the other.

Eventually, the teachers announce that they should get changed to get ready for the evening program.

Sehun retreats to the nearby shower rooms, but not before catching a glimpse of Jeonghan and Jisoo walking together, arm in arm.

 

 

 

 

The school releases the marks for the first term, and Sehun is relieved that he did better than what he’d expected. He’s particularly happy that some of his grades went up from midterms, especially with science.

The surprise of the first term, though, was Seungcheol and Jeonghan. Seungcheol manages to move up by three ranks, no longer being part of the bottom half of their year. Meanwhile, Jeonghan is suddenly part of the top half of their year, having the highest science grade in their section.

But Sehun thinks another news worth celebrating is that when Jeonghan heads to his classroom, he seeks not just him and Jongin, but Jisoo as well.

Their parents decide to arrange an out-of-town trip for them as their reward for doing well during the first term. Everyone is going to the beach for the summer, so their group decides to go to Sanjeong Lake instead to go camping.

Which is why as soon as school lets out, Sehun excitedly packs his overnight bag, and shops with his mother for supplies. They have a heated debate over the group chat as to whether they’ll bring board games or comics. Jisoo volunteers to bring his guitar, and Sehun accepts the playing cards given to him by his father, just in case they feel like it.

They hop on Jisoo’s parents’ van, where Mr. Hong lets Jisoo take over the car playlist. Sehun finds himself on the second row of seats, next to Jeonghan, who already made his way to the window seat. He’s wearing a hoodie, and he has his earphones on, but he manages a smile at Sehun. “I can’t believe I’m excited for this,” he says.

“Me, too.” Sehun returns the smile. His past summer vacations are usually spent at home or at the arcade with Jongin, or sometimes being dragged along to vacations of their respective families. This is the first time he will be spending the summer with a group of friends who he had gotten close with.

Jisoo’s father drops them off Sanjeong Lake and teaches them to set up the tent and how to make fire. Sehun was supposed to explore the forest with Jongin, in search for firewood, but Jongin decides to pass and delegates the task to Jeonghan instead.

“What’s up with him?” Jeonghan asks, an eyebrow raised as he follows Sehun down the trail, thankfully littered with signs so that they won’t get lost.

Sehun shrugs. Jongin had been unabashedly teasing him and Jeonghan for some reason. Something about looking good together and being too close.

He may be clueless about other things, but he’s not _that_ stupid. He gets that same level of teasing from his mother as well. He’s aware of some whispers in the classroom that die down as soon as they catch him listening in.

Sehun can’t deny that Jeonghan is attractive and comfortable being around with. And he enjoys Jeonghan’s company despite their rough first encounter.

And another thing he can’t deny—but won’t admit out loud—is what he feels around Jeonghan aside from friendship. He’s aware of it, the way his breath would hitch or the way his heartbeat would speed up from just a simple smile or a brush of fingers.

The thing is, he’s yet to figure out if this is a serious crush or whatever. That, and if Jeonghan also feels the same towards him. He may be clingy towards Sehun, but he’s equally so around Jisoo and Seungcheol. So he probably isn’t that special.

He snaps out of his thoughts when he feels a poke on his arm. Jeonghan is pouting, and it’s really cute. “What?” he asks.

“What’s on your mind?” Jeonghan asks, head tilted to the side. “I was talking to you and you weren’t replying.”

“Oh.” Sehun feels warmth creeping to his face. He didn’t mean to drift away like that. “Sorry. Just tired, that’s all.”

Jeonghan looks at him dubiously for a solid few seconds before shaking his head. “Okay.” He crouches down and picks up a twig, adding it to Sehun’s stack of twigs and branches for firewood. “But you know you can talk to me about … stuff, right?”

Sehun knows that. But the last thing he wants right now is to share his feelings to Jeonghan, especially when he isn’t so sure about them himself. “Maybe I’ll tell you,” he says. “But not right now.”

Jeonghan doesn’t mask his frown, but he doesn’t complain either. He drops the subject, and they continue looking for firewood.

By the time they return, the tent has been set up and Jisoo and Seungcheol have prepared the food. Neither of them are any good at cooking, so Sehun is relieved that they brought ones that are easy to cook, which is just sausages and pork that they could roast on the fire.

Seungcheol brings out a cooler with bottles of beer, much to his surprise. “I don’t think this is legal,” Jongin points out. “How did you even stash that in Jisoo’s dad’s cooler?”

Seungcheol merely shrugs. “Come on, we have no adult supervision. And this isn’t gonna get us drunk. I only brought two bottles for each of us.”

“That’s very generous of you,” Jeonghan chuckles, taking the bottle Seungcheol has handed out. “Just one bottle for me, though. I want to remember this day.”

Sehun does, too, but he takes a bottle of beer anyway. He takes a sip and immediately regrets it, making a face and sending the bottle back to a laughing Seungcheol.

Luckily, there are some other drinks stashed in the cooler, which Jongin, Sehun, and Jisoo take. Jeonghan finishes only one bottle before leaning his head on Sehun’s shoulder. Sehun’s heart skips a beat, but doesn’t question it. Instead, he runs a hand through Jeonghan’s hair, the younger one sighing contentedly.

The others eye them curiously, but they didn’t mention anything.

They talk mostly about everything they could think of—school, their families, Seungcheol’s participation in the upcoming guild tournament, the songs Jisoo should play on the guitar, and other topics Sehun couldn’t remember.

“Okay,” Jisoo speaks up once they’ve calmed from laughing after Jongin made a joke, “I wanna know what’s the deal between Jeonghan and Seungcheol. You guys are awfully close. Too close, in fact.”

Sehun misses the warmth on his shoulder when Jeonghan lifts his head, an eyebrow raised. Meanwhile, Seungcheol had just slapped his thigh and is laughing as if Jisoo had cracked the funniest joke on earth.

“Really, ‘Soo?” Jeonghan says incredulously. “You think Cheol and I are a thing?”

Jisoo’s face turns into a warm shade of red. “It’s just … I don’t know, it’s a question I’ve been meaning to ask since you two started hanging out.” He looks at Jongin and Sehun. “Haven’t _you_ guys wondered about them?”

Sehun knew he had wondered back then. Jeonghan and Seungcheol are on a different level of friendship, more intimate than Jongin and Sehun are. The two could understand each other with a simple glance, and they could anticipate each others’ needs before they could voice them out.

And Sehun doesn’t miss the way they cling to each other, the way they hold hands or whisper into each other’s ears. He doesn’t miss the boiling sensation at the pit of his stomach and the way he wants to clench his fists whenever the two of them do that in front of him.

Seungcheol laughs and shakes his head. “Jeonghan and I are just friends,” he says. “Besides, he’s way too in love with someone else.”

“Cheol, shut up!” Jeonghan is red in the face as he gets up and charges toward Seungcheol, who promptly gets up and runs away.

The question was dropped by the time night falls. They tell ghost stories, Jisoo plays the guitar, and they turn in for the night. They grab their respective sleeping bags and sets them up wherever they feel comfortable.

Sehun tosses and turns in his sleeping bag, but he couldn’t find himself to drift off. After what feels like an hour, he sighs and sits up, taking a look around him.

“Can’t sleep either?”

Sehun turns to the side and meets Jeonghan’s eyes. He shakes his head.

Jeonghan sighs and stands up. “Sit by the lake with me?” he offers. He approaches Sehun and holds out his hand.

Sehun is very sure he could never say no to Jeonghan at this point. He nods, clasping Jeonghan’s hand as the younger one pulls him up.

They sit close to each other, arms close as they look out at the lake. All is quiet, except for the chirping of the crickets, and the waters are still. Sehun looks up at the night sky and is disappointed with the lack of stars.

“Cheol and I,” Jeonghan speaks up, “we never considered being together.”

Sehun blinks and turns to Jeonghan, realizing their faces are so close. But he doesn’t move away. “Because you like someone else?” he guesses.

“That’s just recent.” Jeonghan blushes and looks back at the lake. “We kind of … considered it, but it didn’t really work out. We’re friends, and that’s that.”

Sehun nods. He didn’t know why Jeonghan had to tell him, but somehow the words lifted something heavy off his shoulders. “Why didn’t Seungcheol fit the bill?”

Jeonghan throws his head back and laughs. “Don’t get me wrong, he’s attractive and he’s nice,” he says. “I just didn’t … feel we should be something more. And he felt the same. Besides …” He looks over his shoulder and lowers his head, as if he’s about to tell a secret. “He kind of likes Jisoo.”

“Oh.” Sehun looks over his shoulder as well. “Now that I think about it … he did become attached to Jisoo these days.”

“He’s lovesick, it’s disgusting.” Jeonghan chuckles.

“You also like someone else,” Sehun points out.

Jeonghan hums, slightly nudging Sehun in the arm. “Do you want to know who?”

“Um …” Sehun gulps, his heartbeat going on overdrive. Part of him wants to, but another part of him wants to run away. What if he doesn’t like the person?

Somewhere, at the back of his mind, he thinks, _What if it’s not me?_

“Sehun?”

Sehun almost jumps when he feels a hand fingers graze his cheek. Heat radiates from his face when he feels Jeonghan’s eyes on him, questioning yet amused. His gaze turns to Jeonghan’s lips, thin yet tempting to lean forward to …

His heart skips a beat when Jeonghan’s tongue flicks out to his lips. “Do you get it now?”

 _Oh_.

Sehun gulps again and meets Jeonghan’s eyes, silently asking for permission. He could barely contain his grin when Jeonghan nods, and he leans in.

Their first kiss is awkward, noses bumping and Sehun wondering if he’s doing the right thing. There are no fireworks, just his sweaty palms as he cradles Jeonghan’s face and pulls him closer. The younger one’s heart is beating as fast as his, so he thinks that Jeonghan is just as nervous about this as he is.

He pulls away, and he laughs when Jeonghan whines. The younger one’s face is flushed red, and he is practically glowing as he opens his eyes and smiles at him. Sehun wishes he could take a picture of this moment, their confession that needed no words, and their first kiss.

They ended up sleeping under the stars, arms around each other.

 

 

 

 

“So, you and Jeonghan.”

Sehun grunts, setting down his English textbook. “What about us?” he asks.

“You guys kissed,” Jongin points out, and he laughs when Sehun chokes on air. “Oh come on. I saw you guys kissing in the kitchen yesterday. It was sweet and disgusting at the same time.”

It’s been a week since their camping trip. The days in the summer are slow, and torturously so because of the heat and the occasional rains. Sehun and Jongin continue to attend cram school then spend their usual study sessions with Jeonghan and Seungcheol.

“We’re …” Sehun leans back and looks up at the ceiling, hoping that the ceiling fan could go faster because he badly needs ventilation. “We kiss and hold hands, but I don’t know.”

“What’s there to talk about when you guys have been pining for each other since god knows when?” Jongin snorts. “You guys are boyfriends, right?”

Are they, just because they kissed and held hands? Sehun can’t be so sure. “I’ll get back to you on that one,” he says, deftly dodging a shove from his best friend.

Summer also meant the town is busy preparing for the fireworks festival. Even though the festival would be in August, the town is a flurry of activity, tacking posters on the lamp posts and advertising their booths door to door. Even the head organizer came to their house to announce the big fireworks display at the end of the night.

The fireworks festival just happened to be on Seungcheol’s birthday. The group decides to celebrate with lunch at Seungcheol’s house before heading to the festival grounds. Everyone is abuzz with excitement, and they even invite Jihoon, Wonwoo, and Soonyoung to hang out with them.

As for Sehun …

“Go to the town festival with me,” he tells Jeonghan. They’re lounging around at Jeonghan’s back garden, Jeonghan lying on Sehun’s lap. The heat is overwhelming, and they’re trying to keep cool by sitting by the fan.

Jeonghan looks up at him, eyes droopy after being awakened. “I thought we’re already going,” he points out.

Sehun hopes that his red face is because of the heat. “I mean …” he stammers. “We’re going as a group, but … can you be my date?”

He still can’t talk about it, for some reason. The thought itself makes his heart race and his palms sweat. Maybe some other time. Maybe during the festival.

Jeonghan looks more wide awake, and he chuckles, reaching up to caress Sehun’s cheek. “Of course.”

 

 

 

 

They all head to Seungcheol’s house first thing in the morning, disturbing his peaceful sleep by singing him a birthday song as they brought out a cake, threatening to eat the cake if he doesn’t get up.

The town is festive, and Sehun can’t help but feel cheerful as well as they walk the streets that day. Most of the townspeople are dressed up in costumes, others handing them headbands and funny masks for later.

By the time night falls, the town is more alive than ever. Booths sell food and encourage people to play games, different kinds of songs are on full blast whichever corner they take, and there are different buskers playing songs.

“I haven’t enjoyed festivals since ever,” Jeonghan admits. They’ve parked themselves on a miraculously empty bench, munching on street food that they bought for sharing. The number of people have increased, and it’s probably because the fireworks display are about to start soon.

“I’m insulted,” Seungcheol says with a pout. “We hung out at last year’s festival, and you seem totally fine with it.”

“Because I do my best to tolerate your dad jokes,” Jeonghan replies with a roll of his eyes. “At least Jisoo here is much more patient about it than I am.”

Sehun stifles his laugh just as Jisoo chokes on his snack.

Soon, a crowd is forming on the river, everyone getting ready for the fireworks display. For some reason, their group split up. Jongin had been dragged by some of their classmates, the younger ones went to another side of the river, Seungcheol and Jisoo were … somewhere.

“Do you think they’ll get together after this?” Jeonghan asks, swinging their hands softly as they move to a quieter side of the river.

Sehun chuckles. “I hope so,” he says. “They’ve been staring longingly at each other for god knows how long, and it’s driving me crazy.”

“Cheol said the same thing about us,” Jeonghan points out. “Now, he’s getting a taste of his own medicine.”

They reach an area of the riverbank where there are only a few people lurking. They sit down by the riverbank, hands linked together. No one speaks a word, the silence comfortable enough for both of them.

“Do you think I have what it takes to get to KIST?”

The question takes Sehun by surprise. They’ve discussed schoolwork, but this is the first time Jeonghan brought up something about a plan to go to university. “The chemistry program?” he clarifies, though he’s sure Jeonghan is referring to that.

Jeonghan nods. “My homeroom teacher said I fit the bare minimum requirements, but given my laziness since … I don’t think I can catch up with the rest of them.” He sighs. “Maybe I shouldn’t have slacked off.”

“It’s kind of too late to regret that now,” Sehun chuckles, brushing a hand through Jeonghan’s hair. “It doesn’t hurt to still try, though.”

“What if I don’t get in?”

It’s strange for Jeonghan to sound so unsure about something. But then again, it’s understandable. He’s just starting to rediscover his love for something that he had pushed away for so long. “It doesn’t have to be KIST,” he says, finally. “There are probably other programs out there you can try. It’s not gonna be the end of the world if you don’t get in.”

Jeonghan sighs, wrapping an arm around Sehun’s waist. “What about you? Got your future figured out?”

Sehun shakes his head. “I’m sure I’m not gonna take up anything related to science,” he says with a chuckle. “If you get into KIST, we might have to be in different universities, though.”

Jeonghan sighs. “Kakao Talk exists,” he points out. “We can meet during weekends and in the holidays.”

Sehun knows that. But he still doesn’t like how, by next year, they might not be in the same campus anymore and that different schedules might cause them to drift apart. And to think this … thing between him and Jeonghan is just beginning.

“You’ll keep in touch, right?” he speaks up. “Even when we’re in different places after high school?”

Jeonghan takes his hand and laces their fingers. “Definitely,” he says, before kissing Sehun on the cheek.

Their conversation is interrupted when there’s a flurry of talks surrounding them once more. The fireworks festival is about to start. Sehun gets up and holds out his hand, pulling Jeonghan up.

The fireworks are beautiful, as expected. Everyone oohs and aahs as they watch light take up different shapes and colors. He feels Jeonghan squeeze his hand tightly, and the laugh from the younger one is music to Sehun’s ears.

He turns to Jeonghan, who’s smile is wide as he looks up. Sehun’s heartbeat quickens, as he wonders what it would be like staring at those eyes for the rest of his life. Or for as long as he could, if he isn’t being so dramatic.

He likes this, holding Jeonghan’s hand and having Jeonghan to himself. He’s looking forward to more days when it’s just him and Jeonghan, going out on dinners or movies or just hanging out in each other’s rooms.

Jeonghan has strayed his gaze from the fireworks to him. He’s still smiling and he’s so beautiful, much so than the fireworks above them.

Sehun turns to face Jeonghan, letting go of his hand to cup the younger one’s face. The smile disappears from Jeonghan’s face, turning into something more questioning. Sehun wants nothing more but to lean down and kiss the questions away.

And so he does just that.

Sehun doesn’t let go of Jeonghan’s face when they pull away, instead resting his forehead against the younger one’s. “Be my boyfriend?” he sputters out, just before his last ounce of courage fades away.

It’s all worth it when he sees Jeonghan smile, brighter than the fireworks above them, and nod before closing the distance between them once more.

 

 

 

 

Somehow Sehun had checked his maps app and figured which university is closest to KIST. Korea University is a nine-minute train ride away. Supposing he passed Korea University, he could drop by KIST to visit Jeonghan.

Or if he doesn’t get into Korea University, Kyunghee is a little nearer, with a 25-minute commute to KIST. It also has less stringent admission requirements, at least compared to SKY universities.

Maybe he’s starting to have a plan. Sure, it might involve being near his boyfriend, but at least it’s something.

And for the first time in a long time, he wants to make something work.

 

 

 

 

But Sehun learns quickly that not all plans will work out.

“We’re moving to Chicago.”

It’s his father’s announcement as they have dinner, together with the rest of his group of friends. Sehun almost drops his fork, and he could have sworn that everyone else is staring at him as if he had grown horns.

His father got promoted, he finds out. A manager in the company’s Chicago branch is something to be proud of. His father deserves it.

His family hasn’t figured it out yet, but his father decided that he would be the first to move to Chicago. Sehun and his mother would follow, after his high school graduation.

Which is fine, but it’s a lot to take in. Moving would mean unearthing himself to what he’s used to – his home, his university plans (or lack thereof), his friends.

Jeonghan.

“Sehun.” Jeonghan’s gentle squeeze of his hand brings him back to reality. Sehun is lying on the bed, while Jeonghan is leaning against the edge. His forehead is creased as he frowns, and Sehun wants nothing more than to kiss that frown away.

“I was planning to get into Kyunghee,” he speaks up, turning over so that he’s facing Jeonghan. “If I don’t get into Korea U, at least Kyunghee’s the university I could find nearest to KIST.”

Jeonghan blinks. “You were planning to go somewhere near me?” he asks incredulously.

“Is that a bad thing?” Sehun asks, feeling his cheeks flame up.

The younger one shakes his head. “It’s sweet, but surprising,” he says. “But what if I don’t get in KIST and you get into Kyunghee? What if I get into Gwangju instead or take a science program from a different university?”

Sehun honestly hadn’t thought that far. “We’ll make it work, right? I’ll visit you in Gwangju when I’m free.”

“You really are sweet.” Jeonghan chuckles, reaching up to rub a thumb across Sehun’s cheek. “But now that you’ll be in Chicago, what are we gonna do about it?”

He doesn’t want to be reminded of it, but at least he still has until the end of the school year to prepare himself. But being in Chicago complicated his plans. Chicago is a different country, a different continent, a different time zone. He can’t just fly back to Seoul to see Jeonghan or his friends. He had to wait for the holidays, or if he could come back at all.

“I don’t know,” he says with a sigh. He wishes he or Jeonghan or someone has the answers, but he knows life doesn’t work that way. Unfortunately. “We’ll figure it out. Probably.”

Jeonghan hums, finally standing up and sneaking next to Sehun on the bed. Sehun wraps an arm around the younger one, pulling him close until their lips are pressed against each other.

They have six months to spend until he flies to Chicago.

Six months to figure things out.

 

 

 

 

Summer is quick to pass, which meant that the days have become cooler, much to his relief. Sehun is only too happy to add a jacket in his uniform as school resumes.

He had spoken to his teachers and the principal about Chicago. He still has plans to attend supplemental classes and cram school, since he thinks they will be helpful anyway when he applies for universities in Chicago. And he still wants to take the CSAT, just in case he might not end up flying to Chicago anyway. (Those chances are slim.)

He resolves to make the most of his remaining months in Seoul. That meant bonding with classmates he had rarely talked to before, exploring places he normally wouldn’t have gone to. He’s surprised to find out that he’s well-liked, though not as popular by the standards of his most popular classmates.

He had strangely come to appreciate cram school sessions and study sessions at home. He has come to like economics, and actually considers a management degree. He’s not yet sure if this is a career he wants, but at least it’s something.

What he can’t make up his mind about, though, is him and Jeonghan. He knows they’re boyfriends, but he’s also aware that distance could kill a relationship.

Still, he wants to give it a try.

 

 

 

 

The air has gotten cooler, a sign that autumn has arrived. October also meant that Jeonghan’s birthday is approaching, and the pressure is on Sehun to make the day a special one.

He thinks he knows Jeonghan well enough to know that the younger one doesn’t like being the center of attention, at least to a large group of people. So he talks to Mrs. Yoon and arranges for a day in the house, all to themselves. He consults Seungcheol and Jisoo as to what gift Jeonghan would like before weighing down on his options and settling for a book.

To his relief, Jeonghan enjoys their small celebration. They have dinner, which they struggled in preparing with the help of Mrs. Yoon. Mrs. Yoon soon brings out the cake, and they laugh and sing the birthday song even if Jeonghan asks them not to. He does give in, though, when he closes his eyes and makes a wish.

“What did you wish for?” Sehun asks as he helps clear the table.

Jeonghan hums, shifting near Sehun at the table counter. His mother is upstairs, so he can be as unabashedly affectionate as he possibly could. “Nothing, really,” he answers. “I’m happy with what I have right now.”

“Even if I’ll be away next year?”

“Chicago’s a good opportunity,” Jeonghan points out. He sets the dishes on the dryer and leans against the counter. “School starts in September, right? That’s plenty of time to figure out your major, and you could try doing a lot of things while waiting.”

It’s funny how Jeonghan has plans for Sehun figured out already. He chuckles and leans next to Jeonghan.

“There’s a chemistry program at the University of Chicago.”

Sehun blinks at that. “Are you …?”

“Thinking of applying?” Jeonghan finishes for him. He chuckles. “Maybe. I don’t think I fit the criteria for the undergrad program, so now I’m considering a Master’s Program. I don’t think I can get a job related to chemistry right away, anyway.”

It’s not supposed to feel weird, but it is. Sehun was the one trying to lessen the distance between them back then. Now, it’s Jeonghan’s turn.

“I have to finish university before I think about Chicago, though.” Jeonghan looks down, a tinge of pink on his cheeks. “If I pass at KIST at all.”

“You will.” Sehun reaches for Jeonghan’s hand, intertwining their fingers. “You’ve been working so hard.”

Jeonghan smiles, squeezing Sehun’s hand. “I kind of wished we’ll make this work,” he says. “Seoul and Chicago, or in case we both end up in Chicago.”

Sehun wants to make it work, but he shares the same thoughts as Jeonghan. “I think we will,” he says.

“Because I wished for it?” Jeonghan chuckles.

“Or”—Sehun turns to face Jeonghan, using his hands to trap the younger one against the counter—“because it’s us.”

The younger one giggles and wraps his arms around Sehun’s neck. “You’re so cheesy,” he says, pulling him closer. “You’re lucky I’m dating you.”

“I definitely am.” Sehun laughs, leaning closer until their lips meet.

And he means it. Cheesy as it may sounds, he feels lucky to have met Jeonghan, even if the circumstances were more than ideal. He’s lucky to have gotten to know many aspects of Jeonghan – sharp tongue, caring side, lazy moments, and more.

He can’t wait to get to know him more tomorrow, and in the days to come.

 

 

 

 

Finally, the dreaded day has arrived.

He wakes up at three in the morning, checking his phone to be bombarded by a series of emojis in the group chat, implying that everyone else is as nervous about today as he is.

He flips through his notes and double-checks his bag to see if he has brought everything—his pencil case, his exam permit, his water bottle—then heads to the bathroom to take a shower. He relishes the comfort the warm water brings against his skin, because he knows that once he steps out of his house, everything is going to be brutal.

He waits for his parents to get ready, and he hops in the family car. They don’t head to the test venue right away. There’s a restaurant that’s already open as early as five in the morning, serving a hearty breakfast for test takers and their parents.

The others are already there when they arrive. His parents chat with his group first before saying their goodbyes to leave for church, where the other parents are. Jeonghan takes him by the hand and drags them to where Jongin, Jisoo, and Seungcheol are. “Already ordered for you,” he says.

“Thank you.” Sehun squeezes Jeonghan’s hand before sitting down and greeting his friends, grabbing the sticky toffee next to his breakfast set.

“Ready to die?” Seungcheol asks with a grim smile before sipping his coffee.

Sehun snorts. “I’ve been dead for the past ten years. This should be nothing.”

They eat breakfast in silence, the only sounds are the clanging of utensils and the flipping of notebook pages. Sehun gives up cramming when he feels his brain about to explode and stuffs all his notes back in his bag. “I’m gonna go get some fresh air,” he announces, getting up.

“I’ll come with you,” Jeonghan says, standing up as well, intertwining their fingers as they head out of the restaurant.

Outside is pure chaos at six in the morning—students in different uniforms huddled with their friends or hugging their parents, most of them on the verge of tears; other students, probably in the lower years, handing out sticky toffees for good luck; some parents buying good luck charms. Sehun had seen this chaos on television, but nothing beats experiencing it first-hand.

“I can’t wait for this to be over,” Jeonghan says as they walk to a quieter alley.

Sehun nods. “That dinner at your place is still good to go, right?” he asks.

“Yeah, of course. My mom and my sister practically went all out with the feast. Then again, we need to eat our feelings out after all this is over.”

He laughs at that. “I don’t even know what I’m gonna do after the exam,” he admits. He leans against the alleyway’s walls and sighs in relief that the noise of excitement and nervousness from the people around them has lessened somewhat.

“You have Chicago,” Jeonghan points out.

Sehun sighs. “I know, but it’s like I studied for this all my life, and I didn’t think of how I’m gonna live my life after I finished studying.”

“You and every other kid in South Korea.” Jeonghan chuckles. His hands reach for Sehun’s collar as he adjusts them. “We’ll be okay.”

He hopes so, but a huge part of him believes they will be.

Jeonghan has barely finished adjusting Sehun’s collars when he pulls the younger one close to an embrace. Jeonghan yelps, but sighs and melts into the embrace. “What are you thinking about?” Jeonghan asks.

Nothing, if he’s being quite honest. He just needs Jeonghan’s warmth to get through the next eight hours. “I’m still nervous,” he mumbles as he buries his face on Jeonghan’s shoulder.

“I know. Me, too.” Jeonghan tightens their embrace.

They reluctantly pulled away from each other to return to the restaurant. By the time they return, the atmosphere has become more tense, and they were greeted by clipped smiles from their friends and classmates. (Seungcheol and Jisoo were holding hands, whether it’s for comfort or something else, Sehun doesn’t know.)

“It’s time to die,” Jongin says, cracking his knuckles. “It was nice knowing you all.”

“Don’t be so dramatic,” Sehun says, but he reaches for Jongin’s hand anyway. God knows he needs it as much as he does.

The cheers were loud as bystanders cheered for them when they entered the test venue. They go through inspectors who brandish metal detectors, and they turn in their bags, books, and phones before entering the building. Sehun couldn’t even kiss Jeonghan good luck, as they were instructed to head to their assigned rooms as soon as possible.

“Meet me back in the restaurant when we’re done?” Jeonghan manages to tell him before he was reprimanded for slowing down the line.

Sehun hopes that the younger one manages to see him nod before disappearing into the solemn silence of the building’s hallways.

 

 

 

 

The sun is setting when Sehun steps out of the test venue, walking aimlessly along with the other test takers. His mind is blank, and he feels like his soul left his body.

There’s a hand on his shoulder, and he spins around, only to be almost tackled to the ground. He would have yelled, but he instantly recognized Jeonghan’s scent.

“We’re done,” Jeonghan sighs against his chest. “We did it.”

Cheers erupt around them, a sign that the other test takers have left the building and are now ready to celebrate for the end of years’-long studying. He sighs in relief as well and pulls Jeonghan closer. “Yeah. We did it.”

 

 

 

 

The school is quieter than usual the next day. Some of them decided to skip class to take a rest from CSAT, while the others perhaps decided not to show up for shame of doing badly in the exam.

Seungcheol suggests that they skip class during lunch break, and Sehun agrees, even dragging Jisoo and Jongin along. The school patrol doesn’t seem to mind them, mentioning that senior students tend to skip class after CSAT anyway. Today’s like a cheat day for them.

They buy lunch at the GS25, with Changmin treating them for working hard. They end up sitting by the riverbank, eating their lunch and staring out at the waters. No one spoke for a while, and Sehun thinks the exam must have drained them for the next week or so.

“What now?” Jongin asks, tossing a pebble into the waters.

Sehun shrugs. He had been studying for the CSAT almost his whole life that he suddenly feels so … lost now that there’s nothing else to study so hard for, considering that he passes this year. Even the prospect of living in Chicago doesn’t give him any sense of direction.

“We have a few months left ‘til graduation,” Jisoo points out, hand threading through Seungcheol’s hair, the older one lying on his lap. “We should go out again. Maybe camping?”

“Too cold for camping,” Jeonghan groans. “Can we just stay over someone’s and just play video games or something?”

“Sounds like a plan.” Jongin grins. “Besides, it’s been a while since I kicked Sehun’s ass.”

Sehun raises an eyebrow. “We’ll see about that.”

They spend more time together than usual, and they could spend every waking day together, if they could. Sehun’s aware that time is ticking fast, and in a few months, he won’t be able to be around his close friends. So he wants to make each moment count.

 

 

 

 

It’s in the first week of December when his life changes.

Sehun is sitting in front of his laptop, furiously refreshing the CSAT results page so hard that he almost falls off his seat when the website actually loads. He gets up and approaches his desk slowly, palms sweaty and heartbeat loud enough to probably wake the neighbors.

His heart stops when he sees his name and test number, along with his score on all subjects. His math score is a little low, and his science is surprisingly high, and the rest are the scores that he expected.

But what matters most was the huge font of letters next to the scores that say: “PASSED.”

He’s never screamed so loud before in his life.

 

 

 

 

The next few hours are a blur, but he does recall waking his parents, who also end up screaming with him. There’s a flurry of activity, and the next thing he knows is that his mother cooked up a feast, and the rest of his friends are in his house.

The good news is, almost everyone passed the CSAT. Almost, because Seungcheol didn’t. He doesn’t look too affected, though. “I can always take it next year,” he says with a shrug. “Or I can find a job that doesn’t require a college degree.”

“Is your mom taking it well?” Sehun asks.

“Surprisingly, yeah. She’s happier that I managed to get passing scores in math and science.”

Jeonghan is practically glowing, if Sehun says so himself. He’s beaming as he laughs at something his mother had said, and he doesn’t even resist when his mother hugs him in front of all the adults.

Sehun can’t help but smile as well, taking a sip of his soda to avoid being questioned for grinning like an idiot.

The celebration ends after a week, though, because applications to universities begin. Sehun doesn’t participate, instead looking up admissions processes for universities in Chicago. He’s looking at the University of Chicago at the moment, and he still has time to submit his application for the third cycle of admissions.

He chooses a major in Psychology. It’s interesting to know how the mind works. It’s not a final decision yet, but at least he knows he’s inclined towards something.

“Psychology sounds cool,” Jeonghan comments when Sehun brings it up to him. “You sure you want that?”

Sehun’s not too sure it’s what he really wants, but an interest in something is a start. He hasn’t had a particular inclination over a college major even when he started cram school. “I think I do,” he answers.

He feels a huge weight has been lifted off their shoulders when the application deadlines end. The campus feels lighter, and the students—at least, the seniors—look cheerier. The teachers still give them schoolwork, but it’s less demanding compared to when they were still studying for CSAT.

And then there’s winter break.

As a reward, their parents booked them a trip to Jungu. Sehun has an aunt who rents out apartment rooms to tourists, and she allowed them to stay on one of her three-bedroom suites for a couple of days.

“You’re going to love the Christmas festival,” his aunt tells them as she ushers them inside the apartment when they arrive. “Call me if you need anything. I’ll be right downstairs.”

The apartment suite is quaint, with pastel blue wallpapers and dark blue curtains draped on large windows. There’s a queen’s bed in between the dining table and the kitchen counter, and a mezzanine floor takes them to another queen-sized bed and another space for a couple of mattresses.

Jeonghan is the first to plop on the bed on the first floor. “Dibs,” he announces with a sleepy smirk.

“Gonna have the whole bed to yourself?” Sehun asks with a raised eyebrow.

“Don’t be silly.” Jeonghan shifts to the side and pats the empty space next to him. “Nap with me, come on.”

They hear Seungcheol snort as Sehun kicks off his slippers and slips next to Jeonghan. “Please remember we’re on the mezzanine floor and we could run into you guys doing something disgusting in the middle of the night while we go to the bathroom.”

“You’re just jealous you can’t do this with Jisoo,” Jeonghan mumbles on Sehun’s shoulder, his arms wrapping around Sehun’s waist.

Sehun has hugged Jeonghan back, so he doesn’t see Seungcheol’s reaction. But he does smirk when he hears a choked sound from behind him.

 

 

 

 

Seungcheol does look flustered when their group goes out for dinner. Sehun and Jeonghan choose to stay behind as they scan the store windows for anything, and there’s no missing the way Seungcheol would cast longing gazes at Jisoo, who doesn’t look the other way.

“Can you please just get them together?” Jongin groans as he falls behind their stroll, letting Seungcheol and Jisoo take charge of the shopping. “The pining is killing me. And I thought it was bad when you two were pining for each other.”

Sehun rolls his eyes. “Aren’t you gonna be a fifth wheel, then?”

“I’m already a fifth wheel. Might as well worsen my agony.” Jongin dramatically shrugs.

They ended up going to a small restaurant that apparently has milmyeon as its best-seller. The place is toasty, and Sehun sighs in relief as he sheds his coat to take comfort in the warmth of the restaurant.

“After dinner, what do we do?” Sehun asks as they absentmindedly browse the menu.

“I wanna see the huge Christmas tree,” Jeonghan pipes up, setting down his menu to point at the photo of the milmyeon, a sign he’s already made up his mind about his order. “And probably shop for gifts.”

Sehun remembers that Christmas is a week away, and he still hasn’t done shopping for his parents and friends. Even Jeonghan, for that matter. He could put it off for next week, but today’s a perfect opportunity because maybe he could find something that he wouldn’t find in Seoul.

“We could split up into groups,” Jongin suggests, “then re-group somewhere else in time for the night festival.”

Everyone agrees, and they have their dinner with their usual animated chatter. After they pay the bill, they decide that Sehun and Jongin would be in one group, and the rest in the other, and that they’ll meet by the huge Christmas tree at the city center.

“When was the last time we ever shopped, just the two of us?” Jongin asks, wrapping his arm around Sehun as they stroll by the streets.

Sehun doesn’t even remember. “That long, huh? Have I been abandoning you, Jonginnie?” He smirks as he pinches Jongin on the cheek.

Jongin snorts in protest as he pushes Sehun’s hand away. “You have, idiot! But I’m not complaining because you look so happy with Jeonghan, okay?”

He can’t help but smile. Jeonghan does make him happy, his mere presence enough to light up something in Sehun’s chest.

“What are you gonna get him?” Jongin asks.

“I don’t know yet.” He wants it to be special. After this Christmas, he would have to ship gifts from Chicago to Seoul. The items displayed on the window of a thrift store catches his eye. “How about we go inside?”

After shopping for what feels like hours, Sehun and Jongin head to their meetup placed with arms of paper bags. His feet are sore, and he wants nothing more than to sit down and have a nighttime snack.

Seungcheol, Jeonghan, and Jisoo have been sitting at the park bench when they arrive. The sight of the trio is amusing as Seungcheol and Jisoo are chatting amicably next to each other, while Jeonghan is sitting next to Seungcheol, a smirk playing on his lips.

“What did you do?” Sehun asks as he approaches Jeonghan, the younger one standing up to link their hands.

“Me?” Jeonghan pouts innocuously. “Just planted a seed, I suppose.”

Sehun hums and turns to see Jisoo laughing at something Seungcheol had said. “I sure hope that works. For our sake.”

“You’re doubting me?” The younger one makes a face.

Sehun knows it’s all in good fun, but for some reason, his hand tightens his grip on Jeonghan’s and he blurts out, “You? Never.”

Jeonghan’s eyes widen at that, but his smile softens after.

The park is full of activity by the time night falls. Booths selling souvenirs and food have popped up, and the local organizers have set up tables and chairs for groups to dine in. The five save one table, then take turns buying food. Soon, the table is full of snacks and ramen, and no one says a word as they dig in.

By the time they finish their dinner, the park has become more crowded. Everyone is gathered at the circle, where the huge Christmas tree is located. Jeonghan’s eyes are bright, and he impatiently drags Sehun through the crowd, wanting to get a glimpse of the lighting up close.

Sehun thinks it’s going to be a regular thing, him and Jeonghan losing the others in the crowd. But he doesn’t mind it one bit. He tightens his grip on Jeonghan’s hand as they squeeze through.

It’s all worth it, when Jeonghan’s makes a sound of awe and looks up at the tree in front of them. The lights are blindingly bright, illuminating the entire square. Cheerful music plays in the background, and even Sehun is amazed at how the lights in the Christmas tree change in time with the music.

“It’s beautiful,” Jeonghan whispers beside him, eyes never leaving the lights in the Christmas tree.

Sehun smiles, too widely, as he squeezes Jeonghan’s hand. “Yeah.”

Jeonghan turns to look at him, rolling his eyes despite the pinkness of his cheeks. “That’s cheesy of you,” he remarks.

He knows that, of course. And he knows most of all that Yoon Jeonghan is beautiful, with his milky skin and angel-like features, and with the way he smiles and brushes the hair out of Sehun’s eyes, and when he sleeps and his chest rises up and down, and all the things Yoon Jeonghan does that Sehun will never get to witness by the time he flies to the other side of the world.

Sehun has to say as much, every chance he gets.

He turns so that he’s face to face with Jeonghan, and the younger one regards him with a curious tilt of the head. His palms are sweaty, and he lets go of Jeonghan’s hand before stuffing it inside one of the paper bags he’s holding. “I-I wanna give you your gift,” he says.

“Aren’t you supposed to give that on Christmas?” Jeonghan chuckles.

Of course, but … “I can’t wait already,” he says, handing Jeonghan the small box. “But you can wait until Christmas, if you want.”

“I want to, but now I can’t wait either.” Jeonghan loops the bags he’s holding to his arms so he could open the small box. A soft gasp comes out of the younger one’s lips as he does so. His eyes are wide as he meets Sehun’s gaze.

“I have one, too.” Sehun feels the warmth spreading to his face as he raises his right arm, showing the bracelet around his wrist. “I know it’s cheesy to own couple items, but I thought … you know … this isn’t too in-your-face, so …”

“Shut up, I love it.” Jeonghan is beaming, and it warms Sehun’s heart. “Put it on me?”

Sehun’s hands are shaking as he does, and it was a struggle to put the clasps together. But Jeonghan holding out his arm and twisting his wrist to get a good glimpse of the bracelet is a good sign.

“Thank you,” the younger one says. He looks down at his paper bags and hands one to him. “Now I have to give you _your_ gift. Though it’s not as amazing as the one you gave me.”

“Nonsense.” Sehun does, and he pulls out a red jacket. He smiles. “I love it. Thank you.”

“I heard it’s really cold in Chicago,” Jeonghan says, closing the distance between them. “I hope that helps.”

He grins. “I made up my mind that I’ll think about you to keep myself warm.”

“Oh my god, stop!” Jeonghan laughs, the redness reaching his face as he swats Sehun on the arm. “You’re cheesy.”

“You love me anyway.”

Jeonghan’s eyes widen at that, and Sehun thinks he made a huge mistake. He and Jeonghan haven’t said _that_ to each other, especially not with Sehun leaving.

But it’s something Sehun truly feels. Sure, he’s seventeen and living in another country soon, and he’s yet to figure out feelings and all, but he wants to say it as he feels it, especially now. Because he’ll never get the chance to.

He sets down his paper bags and takes Jeonghan’s hands in his. “Jeonghan,” he begins.

He doesn’t even get to finish his sentence before arms wrap around his neck, and he’s being pulled forward, lips crashing into Jeonghan’s. He yelps in surprise, but he manages to re-balance himself and wrap his arms around the younger one’s waist.

They pull away only when someone clears their throat. A giggle escapes Jeonghan’s lips, and he’s beaming, brighter than the lights before them. Sehun wants to speak, but the air got knocked out of his lungs, and maybe words will never be enough.

He just wants to remember this moment in its entirety.

“You’re something, Oh Sehun,” Jeonghan whispers, hands on Sehun’s cheeks. “That’s why I love you.”

Sehun wants to die at this very moment, but he knows he can’t, not when he hasn’t said it back.

He presses a kiss to Jeonghan’s temple. “I love you, too.”

And before them, the lights on the Christmas tree shine brighter.

 

**2021**

“You’re spacing out.”

Sehun blinks and feels the squeeze of Jeonghan’s hand against his. Jeonghan is sitting beside him, eyes twinkling as he stares at Sehun, chin tucked under his knuckles. It’s just them at the table now; the others have probably gotten up to socialize or to dance.

“Sorry,” he says sheepishly. “Just couldn’t help but walk down memory lane, that’s all.”

Jeonghan hums and bites his bottom lip. “Why don’t we get out of here?” he offers. “And go on an actual walk down memory lane?”

Sehun doesn’t have to think twice, as he gets up and tangles his fingers with Jeonghan as they walk out of the gym.

It’s already dark by the time they head out, the stars visible on the night sky. They sway their hands as they stroll towards the familiar path leading to the campus buildings. Sehun smiles as he remembers the flight of stairs where he first encountered Jeonghan.

“I still remember how painful it was when you collided against me back then,” Jeonghan chuckles.

Sehun laughs nervously. “I thought you were going to kill me.”

“I was, at first. But then I saw you at the clinic, and I thought you were really cute.” Jeonghan clears his throat and looks down, though there’s no mistaking the pinkness in his cheeks.

“Was making me your errand boy a scheme to get close to me, then?” Sehun teases, lightly shoving Jeonghan.

The younger one bites his bottom lip, his gaze on the ground. “Maybe.”

They walk in silence until they reach the building. They take off their shoes and stow it near the lockers. At the back of Sehun’s mind, it feels weird to do so, but it sort of feels like going back in time.

After much walking and exploring, they reach their destination. It’s the flight of stairs where they first met. Sehun remembers being scared of seriously injuring Jeonghan, and for some reason that had led them to being friends and then something more.

And ten years later, they’re here, and stronger than ever. Sehun was nervous about going into a long-distance relationship when he flew to Chicago. And it was a challenge, with different time zones, the lack of physical contact, and their own schedules.

But somehow, thank god, they made it work. And it was all worth it when Jeonghan applied and passed at the University of Chicago for his master’s degree, and he ended up staying at Sehun’s apartment, where they lived together blissfully.

Jeonghan lets go of his hands and takes two steps at the time until he reaches the middle step. The moon shines brightly against him, casting what looks like a halo around his frame. Sehun opens his mouth to say something, but he knows whatever he says won’t do any justice to the sight in front of him.

Instead, he heads up the steps until he’s face to face with Jeonghan.The younger one tilts his head in curiosity, and Sehun wants nothing more than to kiss that expression away.

So he does. He cradles Jeonghan’s face and pulls him close, pressing their lips together. The younger one makes a sound of surprise, but soon kisses back and wraps his arms around Sehun’s neck. He could feel the beating of their hearts against each other’s chest, and it spurs him to deepen the kiss.

It’s Jeonghan who pulls away from the kiss, going on his tiptoes to peck Sehun softly on the lips. He’s beaming, brighter than the moon above them, and Sehun does his best to capture every detail of this moment in his memory.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Jeonghan breaks the silence between them.

There’s only one sentence that comes to mind, one that he would tell everyday but never get tired of telling. “I love you, Yoon Jeonghan.”

And every time, Jeonghan would beam, his cheeks flushed pink. “I love you, too, Oh Sehun,” he says before leaning forward to close the distance between them once more.

They pull away when they hear Seungcheol calling them from the distance. A quick peek from their side of the stairs revealed that their friend is standing at the center of the field, bouncing like a happy child. Approaching the field are Jongin and Jisoo, shaking their heads at Seungcheol’s antics.

“Hey, you two!” Seungcheol yells, voice echoing throughout the area. “Race you to the other side!”

They look at each other and grin before starting their own race to catch up to Seungcheol.


End file.
